Diary of an Ascending Addict

One of the greatest changes I’ve been noticing more and more, day after day, is that I’m off the emotional roller coaster. My drastic and dramatic mood swings have completely abated. I’m enjoying this peace of mind more than can say. I don’t shock myself and others anymore, with unwarranted, angry and insecure eruptions.

That’s a huge relief. My nervous system is thanking me right now.

Aside from a few bouts of mainly social anxiety here and there, it’s been smooth sailing: “La vie est un long fleuve tranquille”.

Talk about transformation.

Underneath this nascent serenity, a joyous expectation of what’s to come. Sort of a curious childlike discovery mode.

I don’t particularly like it when people say ‘you are not your story, or get over your story’. It’s not a story when you’re living it, it’s… your life. A very real experience, that encompasses all of you, all of your mind, heart and senses, more or less long, more or less difficult. Life is a perfect holographic simulation.

It only becomes a ‘story’ once you’re able to recount it. In hindsight. It’s only when you’re done experiencing, when you can clearly see the learning curve in its entirety, from start to finish and take enough distance to give the life phase a plot that it becomes a story.

Once you understand, no, once you feel how loved you are, how much you’re embraced and cherished by the Universe – everything changes.